Lover I Don't Have to Love
by Twilighter-SarrahBear254
Summary: After Edward leaves in New Moon, the cullens return to forks 200 years later to find a verry different, very changed bella. T for language and sexual content.
1. Preface

The memory of that day will forever be etched into my mind. After Edward left I had nothing. I returned to our meadow, where he had first told me he loved me, the lying bastard. I wanted to feel, pain or pleasure, I didn't care. I needed _something_. Laurent appeared and bit me, but he hadn't killed me, no, he changed me into the one thing Edward never wanted me to become. I was found by a coven of vampires, who took me in and made me a part of their family. Human blood repulses me, and I am a mind reader/telekinetic. My bands name is "Bleeding Hearts", and I drown myself in my music. I have yet to be fully happy.


	2. Chapter 1

Another concert, another chance to forget. My coven/band is:

Kris (girl)-power-sees the future. Plays the bass.

Taylor (boy)-power-shape shifter. Plays the drums.

Kaitlin (girl)-power-time travel. Plays the electric guitar.

Brendon (boy)-no power. Vocals/guitar.

Bella (me)-power-telekinetic, mind reader. Vocals/keyboard.

Today we're playing a gig in L.A. Druggies, groupies, and such, but these days, its what I live for. The rush of adrenaline you get on stage, the pulsing of the music, and the countless screaming fans.

"Bella, you skank-muffin get you're vampire but out here!" Brendon yelled. I laughed at his new term for me, though it wasn't a lie…

"What whore-sickle?" I shot back. He was smiling as he pulled me onto his lap, straddling him.

"We go on in like, five minutes, get dressed…." There was something suggestive in his voice. He meant get dressed in front of him.

"Whatever babe." No we weren't dating, neither of us "dated", we just fooled around to our hearts extent. He went through much of the same crap as me we understood each other and knew the others story as well as we knew our own. The vampire that changed him promised to love him forever but cheated on him and left him all alone. We were both broken shells of the people we used to be. I kissed him, giving him what we both wanted, and got undressed and redressed; A tight black corset with lime green ribbons tying up both sides, a super short black skirt, and to top I all off, a pair of black stilettos. I looked hot. I would make the kitties drool tonight.

Brendon looked me up and down, "Nice".

"You like?" I asked suggestively.

"Oh I like, I like a lot…" He grabbed my hips. I read his thought and knew what he was up to, but we went on in a minute.

"Sorry babe, we have to go play or the crowd will go berserk." Kris, Taylor, and Kaitlin walked in guitars and drumsticks in hand.

"Hey guys, put your pants on, we're on." Kris said. Gees, our pants weren't even off this time! We listened and took our places on stage in front of the mass of screaming fans.


	3. Important authors note!

**Okay so, not many people have commented, and it seems like my story is kinda crap worthy, so if anyone wants me to continue please tell me!!!!!**


	4. Chapter 2

**I don't own twilight or the song. The song is "situations" by Escape the Fate. Brendon looks just like the old lead singer that is in that video.**

I looked out into the audience, looking, of course, for hot guys. Both Brendon and I had perfected the art of having sex with humans without killing them. I spotted three great looking emo guys at the front, they were on my "to do" list, literally. We were going to open with one of our new songs, written by me, who does absolutely all of the writing, but I don't mind.

"Hello Forks!" Brendon shouted. Gees could he get any cheesier? But he was THE hottest guy I've ever laid eyes on, better looking than Edward even. With his black-layered hair, tattoos (yes we've developed ways to give vampires tattoos, and drugs) creeping up his neck, six-pack accompanied by sex lines, and all around sexiness, I couldn't resist him if I tried.

"Hey guys, we've got a lot of new song for you guys written by yours truly!" I yelled into the mike. Mt words were followed by hundreds or screams and whooping.

"And, I would like to announce that the beautiful Bella is single!" I slapped his arm. "So" he continued "Any guys, or hey even some girls" Slap "Should definitely stop by the dressing rooms…. Lets all have sex!" He finished, which earned another slap by me. The opening chords played and Brendon looked at me as he sang, making it obvious to the crowd that he was dedicating the song to me:

Situations are irrelevant now.  
She loves the way that I tease,  
I love the way that she breathes

I touched her ooh, she touched my ahhh, it was the craziest thing.  
I love the girls who hate to love because they're just like me.  
A certain girl she took my hand and ran it up her thigh.  
She licked her lips and pulled my hair, I fall in love for a night

She can't behave and I'm just a slave,  
don't worry I'll be gone when the morning comes.

Darling what is going on?  
Honestly that never happened  
Lying is your favorite passion.  
Leave me, go where you belong  
Higher heels and lipstick napkins  
dying is your latest fashion.

The frustration it's a regular thing  
I hate the ones who love to hate because they're just like me.  
A certain girl she took her hand and put it in my lap  
*It's way too... she said once you have me you'll always come back.

She can't behave and I'm just a slave,  
don't worry I'll be gone when the morning comes.

Darling what is going on?  
Honestly that never happened  
Lying is your favorite passion.  
Leave me, go where you belong  
Higher heels and lipstick napkins  
dying is your latest fashion.

I know you love to resist  
and all it takes is a kiss  
and you just love to hate me.

You know you love all the lies  
so don't act surprised  
that I just love to hate you.

I kissed your lips you pulled my hair it was the craziest thing.  
I love the girls who love to hate. _[Breathing]_

(Whoa) Darling what is going on?  
Honestly that never happened  
Lying is your favorite passion.  
Leave me, go where you belong  
Higher heels and lipstick napkins,  
dying is your latest fashion

Darling (leave me) what is going on?  
Honestly that never happened  
Lying is your favorite passion  
Leave me (darling) go where you belong  
Higher heels and lipstick napkins,  
dying is your favorite passion!

The crowd went wild jumping with excitement. I turned to Brendon, "I guess they like the song." He just nodded.


	5. Chapter 3

**I don't own twilight; song is "Lover I Don't Have to Love" by Bright Eyes. ENJOY!**

Three songs later, it was time for my favorite duet Brendon and I sang, it explained so much of how I felt because of Edward. For a moment I wondered where he was, and what girl he was saying he loved. The hole in my chest opened, and the air thickened, no, I wouldn't let this happen. I took a big breath and calmed myself. That's what I get for letting myself think about him. I would have extra fun tonight with those hot guys in the crowd.

"Okay guys, it is time for my favorite out of all of our new stuff, it's a song called Lover I Don't Have to Love!!" The crowd went wild as I played the opening chords.

**(Brendon sings**….._Bella sings_……Both Sing)

**I picked you out  
Of a crowd and talked to you  
Said I liked your shoes  
You said thanks can I follow you?  
So it's up the stairs  
And out of view  
No prying eyes**  
_I poured some wine_  
**I asked your name you asked the time**  
_Now it's two o'clock,  
the club is closed we're up the block  
Your hands on me_  
**I'm pressing hard against your jeans**  
_Your tongue in my mouth  
Trying to keep the words from coming out  
You didn't care to know  
Who else may have been you before_  
I want a lover I don't have to love  
**I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck**  
Where's the kid with the chemicals?  
I thought he said to meet me here but I'm not sure  
I got the money if you got the time  
You said it feels good I said I'll give it a try  
**Then my mind went dark  
We both forgot where your car was parked  
Let's just take the train  
I'll meet up with the band in the morning  
Bad actors with bad habits  
Some sad singers  
They just play tragic**  
_And the phone's ringing  
And the van's leaving  
Let's just keep touching  
Let's just keep keep singing  
_I want a lover I don't have to love  
_I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk_  
Where's the kid with the chemicals  
I got a hunger and I can't seem to get full  
I need some meaning I can memorize  
The kind I have always seems to slip my mind  
But you but you  
**You write such pretty words**  
_But life's no story book  
Love's an excuse to get hurt  
And to hurt  
"Do you like to hurt?"_  
**"I do! I do!"  
**_"Then hurt me." [fades]_

If I could, I would have been crying. I turned to Brendon and smiled, he smiled back. I'm glad I didn't love him that way, because like the lyrics say, love's an excuse to get hurt. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a flash of bronze hair.


	6. Chapter 4

**I don't own twilight, songs are 4ever by the Veronicas, and My Immortal by Evanescence.**

I ignored the flash of bronze; anyone could have that color hair and _not_ just him dammit. He's off in Denali or some place else, _anywhere_ but here. I steadied myself took a breath.

"Okay, so apparently we're gonna take five, because Bella wants to change her outfit, chicks! So anyway, I think I'll go help her change so, we'll be back!" Brendon called. Gosh, he is such a horn dog. I don't mind though. I went back stage and grabbed my next outfit. Brendon followed me into my dressing room.

"Did you need something?" I asked, knowing by his thoughts that it wasn't a need, so much as a very great want. He simply grabbed my hips and kissed me like there was no tomorrow. His hands roamed my body, as mine were his.

"Oh, Bella, we have to be back on stage soon, so lets make this quick, please?" He moaned. So I unbuttoned his jeans, and he slid my underwear down my thighs, and we both got off, cursing quite loudly. I pushed him out of the dressing room, and put on my tight little schoolgirl outfit. It complimented my red hair very nicely. I skipped back on stage, ready to sing my solos.

As I went to my place on stage I heard many wolf-whistles and hoots. I sang thinking of Brendon, and his always-amazing sex.

Here we are so what you gonna do?  
Do I gotta spell it out for you?  
I can see that you got other plans for tonight  
But I don't really care

Size me up you know I beat the best  
Tick tock no time to rest  
Let them say what their gonna say  
But tonight I just don't really care

Come on baby we ain't gonna live 4ever  
Let me show you all the things that we could do  
You know you wanna be together  
And I wanna spend the night with you  
Yeah, yeah with you, yeah, yeah  
Come with me tonight  
We could make the night last 4ever

I've seen it all I've got nothing to prove  
Come on baby just make your move  
Follow me lets leave it all behind tonight  
Like we just don't care

Let me take you on the ride of your life  
That's what I said alright  
They can say what they wanna say  
Cause tonight I just don't even care

Come on baby we ain't gonna live 4ever  
Let me show you all the things that we could do  
You know you wanna be together  
And I wanna spend the night with you  
Yeah, yeah with you yeah, yeah  
Come with me tonight  
We could make the night last 4ever

Lets pretend you're mine  
We could just pretend, we could just pretend, yeah yeah  
You got what I like  
You got what I like, I got what you like  
Oh come on  
Just one taste and you'll want more

So tell me what your waiting for

Come on baby we ain't gonna live 4ever  
Let me show you all the things that we could do  
You know you wanna be together  
And I wanna spend the night with you  
Yeah, yeah, with you, yeah, yeah  
So come with me tonight  
We could make the night last 4ever

Come on baby we ain't gonna live 4ever  
Let me show you all the things that we could do  
You know you wanna be together  
And I wanna spend the night with you  
Yeah, yeah with you, yeah, yeah  
Come with me tonight  
We could make the night last 4ever

Gosh I love that song, the music of it seemed to course through my veins and make my head pound. The next song was always hard for me to play, but when I was done playing, I always felt freer. Everyone cleared off stage, leaving the piano they had just brought in and me. As I sang, I remembered the day Edward left.

I'm so tired of being here  
Suppressed by all my childish fears  
And if you have to leave  
I wish that you would just leave  
'Cause your presence still lingers here  
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal  
This pain is just too real  
there's just too much that time cannot erase

_[Chorus:]_  
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have  
All of me

You used to captivate me by your resonating light  
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind  
Your face it haunts  
My once pleasant dreams  
[ Find more Lyrics on /bO ]  
Your voice it chased away  
All the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal  
This pain is just too real  
there's just too much that time cannot erase

_[Chorus:]_  
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have  
All of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone  
But though you're still with me  
I've been alone all along

_[Chorus:]_  
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have  
All of me  
oh  
me, oh  
me, oh

I wish I was human again, then I could cry like I wanted so badly too.


	7. Chapter 5

**I don't own Twilight; song is The Last Night by Skillet. Don't like, call me out for using a Christian song, it was very fitting and I like the song, if you don't like it then that's you, but please no mean reviews!**

It was time for the last song of the night, which was the worst of them. Not meaning I didn't love the song, it was just so hard to sing. Before I was changed, I started cutting myself. It took away the pain of Edward leaving me. As a vampire I still have the scars. Brendon looked at me to make sure I was okay with singing, and I nodded:

(**Brendon, **_Bella_)

**You come to me with scars on your wrist  
You tell me this will be the last night feeling like this**  
_I just came to say goodbye  
I didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine_  
**But I know it's a lie.  
**  
_[Chorus:]_  
**This is the last night you'll spend alone  
Look me in the eyes so I know you know  
I'm everywhere you want me to be.  
The last night you'll spend alone,  
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go,  
I'm everything you need me to be.  
**  
**Your parents say everything is your fault  
But they don't know you like I know you they don't know you at all**  
_I'm so sick of when they say  
It's just a phase, you'll be o.k. you're fine_  
**But I know it's a lie.**

_[Chorus]_  
**This is the last night you'll spend alone  
Look me in the eyes so I know you know  
I'm everywhere you want me to be.  
The last night you'll spend alone,  
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go,  
I'm everything you need me to be**.

**The last night away from me**

_[Bridge:]_  
_The night is so long when everything's wrong_  
**If you give me your hand I will help you hold on  
Tonight,  
Tonight.  
**  
_[Chorus]_  
**This is the last night you'll spend alone  
Look me in the eyes so I know you know  
I'm everywhere you want me to be.  
The last night you'll spend alone,  
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go,  
I'm everything you need me to be.  
**

I won't let you say goodbye,  
I'll be your reason why.

The last night away from me,  
Away from me.

My voice broke several times during the song. I looked into the audience and saw many people crying, and then they broke into applause.

**Next chapter will be longer and with many surprises I promise! Read and review please!!**


	8. I'm sorry!

**I am so so so sorry it took so long to update, my computer broke, so I'm working really super hard on the next big chapter, so please stay with me!!!**


	9. Chapter 6

**Okay guys, this is the big chapter, with no songs! What could happen?? Btw, this was so hard for me to write!!!**

We walked off stage, letting the help get our instruments. Brendon came up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"So, were are those chicks you had your eye on?" I asked. He pouted and answered in his mind. Oh, they left before he had a chance.

"Poor baby…." I teased.

"Yeah well, were are those emo guys you were looking at hmm???"

I laughed, "Gay, gay, and gay!" I read their minds soon after the concert was over, "Like you!"

He punched my arm, "Hey! I'm bi! You would know!" We were in front of our tour buses door.

"Oh yes I do…" I trailed off kissing him, already slipping in some tongue. It wasn't very long until we were making out against the side of the bus. I knew there were V.I.P people waiting, but it was just too good to stop, so I didn't. I jumped up, hitching my ankles behind Brendon. We stumbled through the door of the bus, and Brendon pushed me into the nearest wall, kissing me long and hard. I heard voices talking, and thoughts, but it was all garbled. I wasn't listening anyway; I was having way too much fun.

Kris cleared her throat, "Dude, we have guests, can you guys stop for two seconds!" I ignored her.

Taylor spoke up, "Guys come on! Leave the room or something!"

I cheerfully flicked him off. I could feel Brendon hard against ripped my shirt off and started biting and licking across my collarbone, earning a very loud moan from me. I was now in my bra and a very short shirt that was pushed even farther up my thighs by Brendon, in front of who knows how many people. I could care less.

"I'm so sorry about them, they never stop they're such animals!" Kris said to whoever was in the room, "what did you say your names were again, it's nice to see some other vampires."

A voice I never thought I'd hear spoke, "We're the Cullen's." I stopped breathing and push Brendon away, because he had frozen too. He was the only one who knew who they were to me. It was Emmet that had spoken, but I didn't look at him, I only had eyes for the bronze haired boy, with his fingers laced with a bleach blonde chick. He looked at me, and that's when I bolted for the door. I heard Brendon running behind me, but I just kept going, I ran and ran not caring where I was. I was on top of a hill in a forest when I finally stopped.

"Leave me," I said to Brendon, my voice empty of emotion. As soon as I knew he was out of hearing distance, I fell to the ground. My heart felt like it was burning, and the hole in my chest was wide open. I screamed, so loud I'm sure the whole world could hear me, but I didn't care. I just screamed, remembering everything that's happened to me because of them. I was unconsciously pulling trees up from the ground my powers were going haywire. I lied there in a fetal position on the ground screaming what was left of my heart out.


End file.
